Issues around creating a safe and secure space

 

A Releasing Your Unlimited Creativity discussion topic

Copyright 2006 by K. Ferlic,   All Rights Reserved

 
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The biggest problem one faces in becoming who and what they are is that all of us have expectations that we lay on others as to what we would like them to become and how we would like the to relate to us. These expectations of others often limit and bind us to ways we would not freely have chosen for ourselves. Rather than live true to ourselves, we live our life to their expectations. To create the space for another, one must be able to be out of mind and become the detached witness and acting only because it is correct to act according to the situation. In regards to creating a space for another, “to act correctly” is to give the safety, freedom and room to explore the depth and breath of who they are in whatever form it takes.

It needs to be realized that in growing up into life, we each face two very limiting phenomenon. One is the expectation of our care givers for us to live in the world in which we are born. No matter how loving our care givers are, they have to condition us to live in the world in which we are born. Exactly what that looks like will vary from society to society and any point in history and geography to any other point in history and geography can be very different. We each have been limited by the time and place we have been born. That is one set of starting conditions imposed on us.

The other is the intensity of the physical experience itself for an incarnating soul. The physical plane is a place of intensity. The intensity itself is orgasmic and early in life we each must “turn the intensity down” to something that is acceptable to us or tolerable to us. If we suffer a lot of pain as a child or some trauma, we will shut ourselves down very quickly and very deeply and effectively render ourselves numb. If we suffer little pain, we still shut ourselves done but we don’t render ourselves numb. If one has not numbed themselves, it is relatively easy to grow into life feeling all that we do and learning how to respond effectively to what we feel. If, however, we have numbed ourselves, which we all tend to do, we do not feel as we should and we grow older and never learn how to effectively deal with the true depth of our feelings and perceptions.

In talking about the true depth and breadth of our feelings and perceptions, it needs to be remembered, we are infinite beings. We are interconnected to all that is and our bodies are energy detectors  and act as antennas perceiving and sensing the current arrangement of energy. We are capable of sensing an enormous amount. This why it is said above that the intensity of the physical experience is orgasmic. As a child, depending on the environment in which we find ourselves, the environment may be too intense and we need to tone down if not shut down what we feel very early in life. Some of us will find that we, personally, did not have traumatic experiences which causes us to shut down what we feel. Rather, the environment around us was just too intense and we were insufficiently accustomed to what we feel at this early age in a new body to remain open. When we shut ourselves down to the feeling of pain, we also shut down our ability perceive this vast interconnection that we sense.

A safe and secure space is a space where we can learn to regain our feelings and reopen ourselves to the depth and breath of what we feel at every level of our being. It as place of freedom to respond however we need to respond as we discover and explore ourselves and shed the past pain and early programming of life that causes us to shut ourselves down and not freely express who and what we are. A safe and secure space is a space where a creation is free to unfold totally in accordance to their true nature and become who and what they are rather than want anyone wants them to be. In many ways, this safe and secure space is the space that would be created for a child or the offspring of a perfectly matched creatively whole and complete feminine aspect and a whole and complete masculine aspect of being. In this space, since the masculine and feminine being are whole and complete unto themselves, they would have no preconceived ideas and expectation as to what their offspring should become or do in the world. The offspring would be free to discover and explore their true nature and unfold according to its own unique nature whatever it looks like.

Related topic
A safe and secure space
Perfectly matched masculine and feminine
A whole and complete feminine aspect of being
A whole and complete masculine aspect of being
The buddy system in creating a safe and secure space
The relation of the masculine and feminine in creating a safe and secure space

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