Jill Bolte Taylor presentation cross references as to how the Releasing Your Unlimited Creativity material integrates with reality
A Releasing Your Unlimited Creativity discussion topic
Copyright 2008 by K. Ferlic, † All Rights Reserved
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One of the primary goals of the Releasing Your Unlimited Creativity material is to release the creative spirit within the individual from the cage of one's own making. It seeks to do so in a faster, easier and gentler way to access the depth and breadth of their inherent creativity to create what they desire in life without the need for pain or an intense disciplined path as required in the past
Cross referencing the Jill Bolte Taylor presentation on "My Stroke of Insight" provides a way to help see how the Releasing Your Unlimited Creativity material and discussions integrate with her experience to both utilize the fact that we are an infinite creative being experiencing a physical experience as a human being for our creative endeavors and whatever we desire to create and provide an understanding a way to experience the infinity of our being. The bold italics and italics refer to discussion topics and/or information available in the Releasing Your Unlimited Creativity material.
The complete, uninterrupted text of the Jill Bolte Taylor presentation is provided in the topic, "Presentation by Jill Bolte Taylor on "My Stroke of Insight."
The story we tell: I grew up to study the brain because I have a brother who has been diagnosed with a brain disorder, schizophrenia.
Statement of clear intention: And as a sister and as a scientist, I wanted to understand, why is it that I can take my dreams, I can connect them to my reality, and I can make my dreams come true Need for clear intention The energy of energy consciousness flows to create an experience of the focus our attention and awareness through what we think and believe.
How we create our experiences - intention for our life: - what is it about my brother's brain and his schizophrenia that he cannot connect his dreams to a common, shared reality, so they instead become delusions? What is the intention for his life such that having this condition provides him the experiences he desired to have. Physical Creation is a shared reality: There is an intention for our life (a dream of the heart) expressed in a shared reality (Physical Creation)
Acting on the intention/masculine way to create: So I dedicated my career to research into the severe mental illnesses. And I moved from my home state of Indiana to Boston where I was working in the lab of Dr. Francine Benes, in the Harvard Department of Psychiatry. And in the lab, we were asking the question, "What are the biological differences between the brains of individuals who would be diagnosed as normal control, as compared to the brains of individuals diagnosed with schizophrenia, schizoaffective, or bipolar disorder?"
So we were essentially mapping the microcircuitry of the brain, which cells are communicating with which cells, with which chemicals, and then with what quantities of those chemicals. So there was a lot of meaning in my life because I was performing this kind of research during the day. But then in the evenings and on the weekends I traveled as an advocate for NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental Illness. Act on what we think we need to do - the masculine way to create.
Manifestation of a desired intention - feminine way to create: But on the morning of December 10 1996 I woke up to discover that I had a brain disorder of my own. A blood vessel exploded in the left half of my brain. And in the course of four hours I watched my brain completely deteriorate in its ability to process all information. On the morning of the hemorrhage I could not walk, talk, read, write or recall any of my life. The feminine way to create - being drawn to the experience we need to have through the unseen. Energy flows in response to the focus of our attention and awareness.
Spontaneous and innocent childlike play in the discovery and exploration of oneís world before mind steps in: I essentially became an infant in a woman's body. A need to return to childlike play and the most creative state of being.
Body as a vehicle for the physical experience of a human being which provides two views of Creation: If you've ever seen a human brain, it's obvious that the two hemispheres are completely separate from one another. And I have brought for you a real human brain. [Thanks.] So, this is a real human brain. This is the front of the brain, the back of the brain with a spinal cord hanging down, and this is how it would be positioned inside of my head.
Two views of Creation And when you look at the brain, it's obvious that the two cerebral cortices are completely separate from one another. Two views to creation - view of the mind, view of the heart.
View of the mind: While our left hemisphere functions like a serial processor.
A bridge point and a dance between the two views: The two hemispheres do communicate with one another through the corpus collosum, which is made up of some 300 million axonal fibers. But other than that, the two hemispheres are completely separate.
Need to experience each view separately to know what it provides - four eyes exercise: Because they process information differently, each hemisphere thinks about different things, they care about different things, and dare I say, they have very different personalities. [Excuse me. Thank you. It's been a joy.] different things, they care about different things, and dare I say, they have very different personalities.
View of the heart, the now, open to feeling. Our right hemisphere is all about this present moment. It's all about right here right now. Our right hemisphere, it thinks in pictures and it learns kinesthetically through the movement of our bodies.
Body as an antenna - surrender to the flow of energy - being open to feeling - the awareness of the body - body wisdom - body consciousness: Information in the form of energy streams in simultaneously through all of our sensory systems. And then it explodes into this enormous collage of what this present moment looks like. What this present moment smells like and tastes like, what it feels like and what it sounds like. I am an energy being connected to the energy all around me through the consciousness of my right hemisphere.
Infinite being of energy consciousness - energy consciousness manifested into a form determined by how consciousness focuses its attention and awareness:: We are energy beings connected to one another through the consciousness of our right hemispheres as one human family. And right here, right now, all we are brothers and sisters on this planet, here to make the world a better place. And in this moment we are perfect. Topics "Origins of Creation" and the "Observer Observed pair and the nature of duality provides" diagrams and discussions of how this is possible.
Wholeness: We are whole. And we are beautiful.
View of the mind - our current mind: My left hemisphere is a very different place. Our left hemisphere thinks linearly and methodically. Our left hemisphere is all about the past, and it's all about the future. Our left hemisphere is designed to take that enormous collage of the present moment. Reflective of mind as we currently know our mind.
Nature of mind: And start picking details and more details and more details about those details. It then categorizes and organizes all that information. Associates it with everything in the past we've ever learned and projects into the future all of our possibilities. And our left hemisphere thinks in language. It's that ongoing brain chatter that connects me and my internal world to my external world. It's that little voice that says to me, "Hey, you gotta remember to pick up bananas on your way home, and eat 'em in the morning." It's that calculating intelligence that reminds me when I have to do my laundry. Mind only knows the past and what is has experienced
The observer observed pair and the nature of duality provides - the bridge point: But perhaps most important, it's that little voice that says to me, "I am. I am." And as soon as my left hemisphere says to me "I am," I become separate. I become a single solid individual separate from the energy flow around me and separate from you. Our identity is the separation. Mind as we know it creates the separation. We create or experiences by how and what we think and believe. Energy flows to create an experience of how consciousness focuses its attention and awareness through what mind thinks and believes. The essential location of the bridge point between inner and outer
Stepping out of mind: And this was the portion of my brain that I lost on the morning of my stroke.
Pain: On the morning of the stroke, I woke up to a pounding pain behind my left eye. And it was the kind of pain, caustic pain, that you get when you bite into ice cream. And it just gripped me and then it released me. Then it just gripped me and then released me.
Gift in pain: And it was very unusual for me to experience any kind of pain, so I thought OK, I'll just start my normal routine. So I got up and I jumped onto my cardio glider, which is a full-body exercise machine. And I'm jamming away on this thing, and I'm realizing that my hands looked like primitive claws grasping onto the bar. I thought "that's very peculiar" and I looked down at my body and I thought, "whoa, I'm a weird-looking thing."
Localized and non localized awareness: And it was as though my consciousness had shifted away from my normal perception of reality, where I'm the person on the machine having the experience, to some esoteric space where
Detached witness: I'm witnessing myself having this experience.
And it was all every peculiar and my headache was just getting worse, so I get off the machine, and I'm walking across my living room floor, and I realize that everything inside of my body has slowed way down. And every step is very rigid and very deliberate. There's no fluidity to my pace, and there's this constriction in my area of perceptions so I'm just focused on internal systems. And I'm standing in my bathroom getting ready to step into the shower and I could actually hear the dialog inside of my body. I heard a little voice saying, "OK, you muscles, you gotta contract, you muscles you relax."
Non localized awareness: And I lost my balance and I'm propped up against the wall. And I look down at my arm and I realize that I can no longer define the boundaries of my body. I can't define where I begin and where I end. Because the atoms and the molecules of my arm blended with the atoms and molecules of the wall. And all I could detect was this energy. Energy. And I'm asking myself, "What is wrong with me, what is going on?" All is energy consciousness. Lost of identification with the mind and with the body and the experiences one has had.
out of mind: And in that moment, my brain chatter,
my left hemisphere brain chatter went totally silent. Just like
someone took a remote control and pushed the mute button and --
total silence. The
place of silence meditators try and achieve
Dance of duality - the dance between heart and mind - the dance of energy consciousness: Then all of a sudden my left hemisphere comes back online and it says to me, "Hey! we got a problem, we got a problem, we gotta get some help." So it's like, OK, OK, I got a problem, but then I immediately drifted right back out into the consciousness,
Heaven, the Kingdom of God, Nirvana: and I affectionately referred to this space as La La Land. But it was beautiful there. Imagine what it would be like to be totally disconnected from your brain chatter that connects you to the external world. So here I am in this space and any stress related to my, to my job, it was gone. And I felt lighter in my body. And imagine all of the relationships in the external world and the many stressors related to any of those, they were gone. I felt a sense of peacefulness. And imagine what it would feel like to lose 37 years of emotional baggage! I felt euphoria. Euphoria was beautiful --
How we create our experiences focus of our attention and awareness, single point focus. and then my left hemisphere comes online and it says "Hey! you've got to pay attention, we've got to get help," and I'm thinking, "I got to get help, I gotta focus." So I get out of the shower and I mechanically dress and I'm walking around my apartment, and I'm thinking, "I gotta get to work, I gotta get to work, can I drive? can I drive?"
Wecreate an experience of that on which we focus, her intention is fulfilled and experienced: And in that moment my right arm went totally paralyzed by my side. And I realized, "Oh my gosh! I'm having a stroke! I'm having a stroke!" And the next thing my brain says to me is, "Wow! This is so cool. This is so cool. How many brain scientists have the opportunity to study their own brain from the inside out?"
Need to surrender to the flow of energy giving rise to the experience we have and allow the energy to fully dissipate in the experience: And then it crosses my mind: "But I'm a very busy woman. I don't have time for a stroke!" So I'm like, "OK, I can't stop the stroke from happening so I'll do this for a week or two, and then I'll get back to my routine, OK."
Dance between energy consciousness and the localization of awareness: So I gotta call help, I gotta call work. I couldn't remember the number at work, so I remembered, in my office I had a business card with my number on it. So I go in my business room, I pull out a 3-inch stack of business cards. And I'm looking at the card on top, and even though I could see clearly in my mind's eye what my business card looked like, I couldn't tell if this was my card or not, because all I could see were pixels. And the pixels of the words blended with the pixels of the background and the pixels of the symbols, and I just couldn't tell. And I would wait for what I call a wave of clarity. And in that moment, I would be able to reattach to normal reality and I could tell, that's not the card, that's not the card, that's not the card. It took me 45 minutes to get one inch down inside of that stack of cards.
Body is a vehicle for a physical experience as a human being and how accident, illness and disease may be the experience we need to have for what we desire to create/experience: In the meantime, for 45 minutes the hemorrhage is getting bigger in my left hemisphere. I do not understand numbers, I do not understand the telephone, but it's the only plan I have. So I take the phone pad and I put it right here, I'd take the business card, I'd put it right here, and I'm matching the shape of the squiggles on the card to the shape of the squiggles on the phone pad. But then I would drift back out into La La Land, and not remember when I come back if I'd already dialed those numbers.
So I had to wield my paralyzed arm like a stump, and cover the numbers as I went along and pushed them, so that as I would come back to normal reality I'd be able to tell, yes, I've already dialed that number. Eventually the whole number gets dialed, and I'm listening to the phone, and my colleague picks up the phone and he says to me, "Whoo woo wooo woo woo." [laughter] And I think to myself, "Oh my gosh, he sounds like a golden retriever!" And so I say to him, clear in my mind I say to him. "This is Jill! I need help!" And what comes out of my voice is, "Whoo woo wooo woo woo." I'm thinking, "Oh my gosh, I sound like a golden retriever."
Creation is not done alone: So he recognizes that I need help, and he gets me help. And a little while later, I am riding in an ambulance from one hospital across Boston to Mass General Hospital. And I curl up into a little fetal ball. And just like a balloon with the last bit of air just, just right out of the balloon I felt my energy lift and I felt my spirit surrender. Spirit surrender or mind surrender to spirit?
The intention for our life - there are reasons for us being here and experiences we desire to have regardless of what mind thinks and believes. And in that moment I knew that I was no longer the choreographer of my life. And either the doctors rescue my body and give me a second chance at life or this was perhaps my moment of transition.
The unseen world - what is the nature and function of the unseen? When I awoke later that afternoon I was shocked to discover that I was still alive. When I felt my spirit surrender, I said goodbye to my life, and my mind is now suspended between two very opposite planes of reality.
Being open to feeling the energy can be painful, hence we shut down our ability to feel: Stimulation coming in through my sensory systems felt like pure pain. Light burned my brain like wildfire and sounds were so loud and chaotic that I could not pick a voice out from the background noise and I just wanted to escape.
Need to get out of mind into feeling: But I realized "But I'm still alive! I'm still alive and I have found Nirvana. And if I have found Nirvana and I'm still alive, then everyone who is alive can find Nirvana." I picture a world filled with beautiful, peaceful, compassionate, loving people who knew that they could come to this space at any time.
Give ourselves permission - return to state of creative play: And that they could purposely choose to step to the right of their left hemispheres and find this peace. And then I realized what a tremendous gift this experience could be, what a stroke of insight this could be to how we live our lives.
Power of intention and passion to create - five requirements to create: And it motivated me to recover. What calls us forth into life, what gives us a passion for life, desire is the fuel of Creation, a reason for living, creating a life worth living.
Creation is not done alone, we need another to give us the experiences we desire to have: Two and a half weeks after the hemorrhage, the surgeons went in and they removed a blood clot the size of a golf ball that was pushing on my language centers. Here I am with my mama, who's a true angel in my life.
We grow our creations from a seed condition It took me eight years to completely recover. The idea of telling people we can find Nirvana here and now was the seed condition which grew to give her the passion to live life and the desire to be in life. That idea grew for eight years to unfold into the life she is now living. In many ways she has demonstrated the creative process, the transformation of consciousness, the mind and ego and recreated a life based on that new understanding.
The Creation Story for the Creativity Perspective: So who are we?
We create our experiences by how we focus our attention and awareness and our creative life energy flows to create an experience of that focus: We are the life force power of the universe, with manual dexterity and two cognitive minds. And we have the power to choose, moment by moment, who and how we want to be in the world.
The dance of mind and heart, the dance of energy consciousness: Right here right now, I can step into the consciousness of my right hemisphere where we are -- I am -- the life force power of the universe, and the life force power of the 50 trillion beautiful molecular geniuses that make up my form. At one with all that is. Or I can choose to step into the consciousness of my left hemisphere. where I become a single individual, a solid, separate from the flow, separate from you. I am Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor, intellectual, neuroanatomist. These are the "we" inside of me.
Free will: Which would you choose? Which do you choose? And when?
Navigating from the heart: I believe that the more time we spend choosing to run the deep inner peace circuitry of our right hemispheres, the more peace we will project into the world and the more peaceful our planet will be.
Creating a life worth living: And I thought that was an idea worth spreading. Learning to operate from the right hemisphere, to use the awareness of the body and the awareness which lies in what we feel, to use the non localized aspects of our infinite being reflected in our intuitive guidance and live to align which gives us life is the whole function and purpose of the Releasing Your Unlimited Creativity understanding and material.
An after thought to the reader for the author
The above hyperlinks contains a set of cross referenced files between the Jill Bolte Taylor stroke experience an what I have been trying to communicate through my writing. Quite simply I had an experience of the infinity of our being similar to Jill Bolte Taylor but not requiring a stroke. Rather, it required me to step out of all that I was taught and believed about myself and life to attempt to free what lived in the heart of another - that is, their creative spirit. In doing so, I experienced the infinity of our being. As Jill Bolte Taylor said in here presentation,
"But I realized "But I'm still alive! I'm still alive and I have found Nirvana. And if I have found Nirvana and I'm still alive, then everyone who is alive can find Nirvana." I picture a world filled with beautiful, peaceful, compassionate, loving people who knew that they could come to this space at any time. And that they could purposely choose to step to the right of their left hemispheres and find this peace. And then I realized what a tremendous gift this experience could be, what a stroke of insight this could be to how we live our lives. And it motivated me to recover......I believe that the more time we spend choosing to run the deep inner peace circuitry of our right hemispheres, the more peace we will project into the world and the more peaceful our planet will be. And I thought that was an idea worth spreading."
All I have tied to do since that experience was to let people know and share how it is possible to have such an experience without the stroke or other painful path.
In any case, when I had the experience of the infinity of our being, I would have missed the experience and not seen it for what it was except for one piece of information.. That was I recognized the creative spirit that was set free and the recognition of that creative spirit forced me to bring together two very different aspects of my life into a wholeness.
The awareness of the creative spirit which lies in each heart kept the door open to see exactly what I had experience. In that awareness I realized there was nothing I have ever seen or read about in any spiritual, religious, mystical, psychological, scientific text or otherwise that prepared me for what I experienced. Hence the need for my writing - to provide a perspective for individual to have such that when they have such an experience, which happens more often than people realize, they will recognize it for what it is and claim their true inherent creativity.
It is interesting to note that Jill Bolte Taylor saw the experience for what it was probably because she was a brain scientist. In studying the brain and having an understanding of how the brain functions see was able to observe the process. But we do not have to be a brain scientist. All we need is a proper perspective to be able to understand the experience when it happens.
Others who have had such an experience such a in near death experiences, mystical experiences within a tradition, or a shamanic experience do not report seeing themselves as the awareness nor as the creator. Rather they see God, see themselves as a spirit/soul, or some thing other than their own creative power and their awareness as a infinite creative being with the body even when they claim they are God as some have done. Jill Bolte Taylor was seeing how she, as an individual, not God or another was defining the boundaries as to who she was and how see was separating herself from the oneness by the left brain and the need to be in the right side of the brain. That is where the real difference lies in her description and the descriptions of others. The doorway to the infinity of our own being is our creativity and what we feel - that is "choosing to run the deep inner peace circuitry of our right hemispheres." That was my observation when I experienced the infinity of our being and what I have been trying to communicate in the writing.
It is sad to realize the our creativity and the awareness of the body and the awareness which lies in feeling is a direct access to the infinity of our being. But they can not be readily used because it looks to much like the control and manipulation other have place on us since our earliest days of childhood.
Our problem as a human being is we define ourselves and who and what we are by the experiences we have. Rather, we simply need to be willing to see ourselves and define ourselves as the creator of the experiences we have and pull the string to ask why we would create such an experience - and we get the answers if we are willing to listen to the answers. All we need is a perspective to understand how it is possible that we can be the creator of our experiences and the creator of the reality of our experiences. With that perspective, we have all that we need to step into the infinity of our being.