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The author has always had a
feeling there was something he was here to do. Before is exploration
for
an alternative way, this awareness always motivated him. The
first awareness of this feeling was at age six.
The author, as many children, did not like school. Rather than go to
school, he wanted to play. To stay home, he would tell his mother he
was sick. She, of course, let him stay home. One day, late in the
afternoon, he was laying on the living room floor at home playing on
a school day. Someone, whom his doesn’t remember, said to him, “You
know, if you miss thirty days of school, you will have to repeat
first grade.” On hearing that, two awarenesses arose. The meaning of
both did not become clear until the
Ultimate Accident and
the remembrance.
One awareness was that he did come to play. So he saw nothing wrong
with missing school to play. Play was what he come here to do. But
he had no real awareness of exactly what type and kind of play to
which his awareness was referring. Ultimately his awareness was
about play being essential to
the most creative state of being.
The other awareness was he had something to do and he could not
afford to waste a year repeating first grade. He knew he had missed
twenty-five days of school. He knew if he really got sick he could
easily miss five days of school. So, he decided he would no longer
get sick and no longer complained about school. He simply endured
school. He knew he did not have the time to waste repeating school.
He ensure he got by and met the grade. After that episode, he never
got sick to any degree that caused him to miss any significant
amount of school during his years of education.
The feeling that he was here to do something and didn’t have time to
waste struck him profoundly in college. At the beginning of his
Junior year of college he realized that switching majors from
Chemical Engineering to Physics in his Sophomore year and being in
the Naval Reserve Officer Training Program caused him to move from a
four year program to a five year program. He didn’t realize that
changing majors causes him to switch from the School of Engineering
to the School of Arts and Sciences. The school of Arts and Sciences
required Science undergraduates to have almost as many credits in
the Arts as an Arts major. That, of course, troubled many of the
Science majors for they felt too many valuable credit hours were
taken away from Science electives and forced them to take Art
electives. But there was nothing they could do about it. Learning
this, he become determined to finish in four years. In essence he
squeezed three years of undergraduate schooling into two.
This awareness of the need to do something also revealed itself
shortly after entering the Navy. After being sent to graduate school
by the Navy, he was puzzled why the Navy didn’t want him to use the
education they just gave him. He came to understand the Navy was
simply interested in warm bodies to do certain job. There was no
real interest in what the individual brought to the job. Yet, he
knew he was here to do something and this education that was given
to him was not to be wasted.
In some ways the view the author had as to how the military wanted
to use people was a very naive view for the author to have after
being involved in some way with the military for over five years.
Yet it struck him in a profoundly different way. There was something
much deeper which he was seeing. It was more about investing
enormous amounts of money and training into an individual and then
not using what was given to them. But that reasoning did not even
begin to reach the depth of what it was he was feeling. He knew he
was here to something and the education the Navy gave him was key to
doing it.
That experience in the Navy started the author to seriously question
why people did not look to the talents inherent possessed by an
individual. As a manager, he always looked to see what was within an
individual and whether or not the job they were performing was
accessing the depth of the individual. For those who seemed to be
miscast, he would look to see if deeper talents could be called
forth. He did help many change jobs. For those who seemed to have
found their talents, he looked to see if they were being effectively
developed.
This awareness took on new importance the more he become involved in
accident reviews and looking for accident precursors in the work
place. He began to see these deeper talents not being released were
contributing to accidents but he had yet to seen the direct
connection. At the time it was an intuitive insight. Yet, as
discussed in the
mystical path, this part of his being was not effectively
utilized until after the
Ultimate Accident.
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