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It is stated in “An
Inherent Mystic” discussion: His second mystical experience
which gave insights into his life was at age four.
The second mystical experience of conscious memory occurred at age
four. In many ways it was a crossroads that determined the path in
life he would follow. At age four the author was drawn to play the
violin. It wasn’t any violin he wanted to play. He wanted to play a
passionate violin. A violin more characteristic of the fiddle and
the extremes of the Hungarian czardas - a slow melocholy section
followed by a quick, fiery passion one. He saw the violin as an way
to express the passion he felt.
His parents arranged for him to meet with is sister’s music teacher.
The music teacher said he was too young to play. As a child he
accepted such a judgement. However, years later he was puzzled since
many child prodigies start at that age. Nevertheless, the teacher
did not want to discourage the interest. The teacher said he would
give the author a little music theory every week when he came to
teach his older sister.
The music told the author he could play the violin but they first
had to make the violin. But, before they could make the violin, they
had to plant the seed and allow the tree to grow to get the wood.
The music teacher told the author that he would teach the author
some basic music theory but they would have to wait for the violin
to be made. So, every week when he met with the music teacher when
the teacher taught his sister, the author would ask, "Do you have my
violin?" The teach would say no and began to tell a story such as,
“The tree has only sprouted from the seed, we have to wait.”
The next week the author asked the same question, but the teacher
expanded the story each week.. The following week the answer was,
"The tree is only an inch high." The next week again a question, but
the answer was now, “The tree is only foot high.” This when on until
the tree grew a good forty feet, was cut down, cut into wood,
carved, and sanded. Then the strings had to be made and put on the
violin. Then the violin needed to be varnished. The questioning
never stopped. Eventually the teacher got sick and could no longer
teach. The author never got his violin but he never lost his
interest as such in the violin. Rather, the author found he needed
to channel his creative passion in some other direction for he
wasn’t going to get his violin.
What is interesting about this story is that the author always
thought the teacher was well intended in what he said. However, just
after the
Ultimate Accident the author learned that all his family laughed
at him because of the story. The author never realized it may all
have been a joke. All he wanted was to play the violin. As an very
young child, playing the violin was a cherished dream that really
never went away. The author use to wonder how is life would have
been different if he had learned to play the violin at age four.
Yet, in hindsight, after the Ultimate Accident, he could see why
such a path in music would not have given him the
minimum set of experiences he needed.
You may ask, “Why didn’t the author take up violin lessons later in
life?” Quite simply for three reasons. The first reason was that by
the age of five, he discovered another
outlet for his creative passion. He found some where to put this
creative energy to protect it and preserve it until it full
potential could be called forth.
The second reason was he learned to play the clarinet around age
twelve so that he could be in the High School band. He was
reasonably satisfied in playing the clarinet because he also easily
learn the saxophone and switched back and forth between the two
instruments. The clarinet and saxophone reasonably satisfied his
musical interests. Actually he was quite good and seriously
considered pursing music professionally because he did like to play.
But the life of a musician didn’t really appeal to him. He didn’t
want to be a music teacher and he got tired of playing the same
songs again and again to appease an audience. Besides, chemistry and
mathematics began to overshadow his interest in music. So he slowly
let playing of music slide away in favor of a professional career.
The third reason why he did not find an interest in pursing the
violin later in life was because an awareness arose somewhere in his
life about the story he was told.. The story about planting the seed
that would grow into a tree which would be made into a violin had a
profound impact on him. The awareness that came to him was the seed
that was planted was his passion and only symbolized by wanting to
play the violin. As the author learned about instruments, he found
the violin had a range most comparable to the human voice. He also
began to understand the passion he saw in the violin was only one
expression or one way to express the passion within one’s being. It
wasn’t really the violin that was pulling him. Then he realized a
tree can take on the order of forty years to mature. He knew there
was something in the story about his life and that it would be forty
years before that passion he saw in the violin could be expressed.
Then the pieces fell into place. As he began his early work
exploring an alternative way to live life at the start of the
journey into creativity, he began to work with psychics to see how
they perceive the unseen energy of Creation. He was surprised when
he was told that there seemed to be an additional
chakra in his system. The additional one was located around the
throat and it was about communicating. What he would do in life
would teach or communicate something of important that required this
additional energy aspect. Other psychics saw something similar but
it was expressed differently than as an additional chakra. They
expressed it using whatever imagery their mind would employ to
interpret the energy they saw. Whether the psychic’s interpretation
was correct or not, it was about forty years after wanting to play
the violin that he stumbled into the
Ultimate Accident. It was then he became aware that he needed to
communicate what he experienced, the awareness of our creative
spirit and how we create our experiences and the reality of those
experience. It was the Ultimate Accident which shattered the ego. It
was the metaphoric equivalent of cutting down the tree so that it
could be make into an instrument.
In the end what he came to discover is that yes, he did want to play
the violin. But he was the violin. He was both the creator and the
creation. It was who and what he though he was that was cut down
after forty years to create that violin. His life is the creation.
His life is an example of the creative process in which we all
participate and have the option to change. In can be said that at
forty four the author was reborn. There was a rebirth. There is a
descriptions of a symbolic rebirth that did occur in response to the
changes that were happening. It is about the
business of the father. It is about becoming ripe and sharing
our fruits. It was about do the business that we came here to do.
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