Sex as a tool for recreation 

A Releasing Your Unlimited Creativity discussion topic

Copyright 2009 by K. Ferlic,   All Rights Reserved

Most individuals understand the pleasures of sex probably more than any other aspect. Although they know sex can result in offspring, they seek the pleasure. It feels good. The proof of this simply statement is the myriad of ways that humanity has pursued birth control and/or ways to prevent conception. Also it is quite widely known that "accidents" often did and still do occur. People do want the pleasure of sex without the need or worry of offspring. However, as discussed in the topic "Sex as a tool for procreation," there is and always will be an offspring in the joining of any intense emotion whether it be love or hate. The only question is what form does the offspring take. If we are going to become an adult and use sexuality wisely we will have to become aware and take responsibility for the offspring that we create at any level of being.

In any case, sexuality and the associated physical intimacy creates a calmness within each other. The more we open and shares their feelings and can be present to what they feel, the greater they can realize a calmness within their being. The deeper and broader we shares and become intimate, the deeper and broader the calmness within our being. Although there is almost always a relaxation in sexuality, the more we can be in play, without intention, without purpose or effort, the greater each can experience the release of tension within their being and the greater the level of calmness and centeredness we can obtain.

However, in this state of play in many cases the sexuality will be so relaxing that all the defenses go down and we can have spontaneous remembrances of past experiences, whether this life or a past life, and/or spontaneous realizations and knowings. Some can be quite terrifying and/or painful. This is one reason why many really fear what can be accessed in sexuality. This relaxed state created by sexuality is the door way to our infinite nonconscious and with a little awareness and practice we can actually use it and in fact, use it as in a state of spontaneous and innocent childlike play.

Rather than realizing how to use the pleasure of sex and it associated calming influence, many use sex to escape the pain of life. These individuals who are attempting to escape life and others, whether they realize it or not, use sex to "dump" what they are feeling into, or onto, a partner. This occurs much more than most are aware. In this regard, many individuals, much more than we would suspect, are hurt and being hurt by sexuality and by their partners than we will first realize.

Some even use sex and sexuality such that the pleasure becomes an addiction as powerful as any other substance than can be used. Whether it be physical intercourse or simply a romantic addiction the sex becomes an addiction to avoid and numb our pain. One way to begin to understand if we are being used in an unproductive way is to ask ourselves is the sexuality is allowing us to grow beyond ourselves and taking us into new realizations and awareness. Or, is our life actually being limited and contracting.

The expansion or contraction may be minimal and hardly noticeable, but it will nevertheless always be present. There is really no "neutral" sex. The greater the freedom to live true to the expression of our creative life energy through sexuality, the greater the expansion and growth we will see and experience. The more we are not free, the more restrictive and suffocating life will become. In some cases it is our partner but in most cases it is our own beliefs about sexuality and free aligning with our creative life energy that is the issue.

If the individual can feel relatively free, sex can be quite enjoyable. It is here the caveat needs to be added. In freedom, sexuality can provide great pleasure. But we have to be consciously and nonconsciously free to engage in it. To engage in sexuality because we get married and we are now "permitted" to freely express our sexuality is not freedom. From a creativity perspective, our creative life energy is not free to express itself and we are just as bound by as if we have denied our sexuality. It is only free to express itself within the boundaries our mind as established as safe and although feel safe, we are still captive to what we believe. That in turn does not allow the free flow of our creative life energy. The freedom is limited It may give our mind the freedom to engage in sex but our creative life energy is not free. It is being controlled by mind and what it thinks. It time we will see that limitation as physical manifestation in our life.

Whether or not our creative life energy needs greater freedom depends on us as an individual. This does not mean there is anything necessarily wrong with the concept of marriage or any other arrangement where two individuals legally join themselves as one. The issue is freedom and whether or not the marriage or some other arrangement is a vehicle to express our freedom to share our life with another or is it a vehicle to keep us bound and contained within a limited set of beliefs that stifle and constrain the free expression of our creative life energy.

Related topics
Correct conditions for sex
A bottom line about sex and our creativity
Sensual experience beyond sex

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