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The biggest problem one faces in
becoming who and what they are is that all of us have expectations
that we lay on others as to what we would like them to become and
how we would like the to relate to us. These expectations of others
often limit and bind us to ways we would not freely have chosen for
ourselves. Rather than live true to ourselves, we live our life to
their expectations. To create the space for another, one must be
able to be
out of mind and become the
detached witness and acting
only because it is correct to act according to the situation. In
regards to creating a space for another, “to act correctly” is to
give the safety,
freedom and room to explore the depth and breath of
who they are in whatever form it takes.
It needs to be realized that in growing up into life, we each face
two very limiting phenomenon. One is the expectation of our care
givers for us to live in the world in which we are born. No matter
how loving our care givers are, they have to condition us to live in
the world in which we are born. Exactly what that looks like will
vary from society to society and any point in history and geography
to any other point in history and geography can be very different.
We each have been limited by the time and place we have been born.
That is one set of starting conditions imposed on us.
The other is the intensity of the physical experience itself for an
incarnating soul. The physical plane is a place of intensity. The
intensity itself is orgasmic and early in life we each must “turn
the intensity down” to something that is acceptable to us or
tolerable to us. If we suffer a lot of pain as a child or some
trauma, we will shut ourselves down very quickly and very deeply and
effectively render ourselves numb. If we suffer little pain, we
still shut ourselves done but we don’t render ourselves numb. If one
has not numbed themselves, it is relatively easy to grow into life
feeling all that we do and learning how to respond effectively to
what we feel. If, however, we have numbed ourselves, which we all
tend to do, we do not feel as we should and we grow older and never
learn how to effectively deal with the true depth of our feelings
and perceptions.
In talking about the true depth and breadth of our feelings and
perceptions, it needs to be remembered, we are
infinite
beings. We are
interconnected to all that is and
our bodies are
energy detectors and
act as
antennas perceiving and sensing the current arrangement of energy.
We are capable of sensing an enormous amount. This why it is said
above that the intensity of the physical experience is orgasmic. As
a child, depending on the environment in which we find ourselves,
the environment may be too intense and we need to tone down if not
shut down what we feel very early in life. Some of us will find that
we, personally, did not have traumatic experiences which causes us
to shut down what we feel. Rather, the environment around us was
just too intense and we were insufficiently accustomed to what we
feel at this early age in a new body to remain open. When we shut
ourselves down to the feeling of pain, we also shut down our ability
perceive this vast interconnection that we sense.
A
safe and secure space is a space where we can learn to regain our
feelings and reopen ourselves to the depth and breath of what we
feel at every level of our being. It as place of freedom to respond
however we need to respond as we discover and explore ourselves and
shed the past pain and early programming of life that causes us to
shut ourselves down and not freely express who and what we are. A
safe and secure space is a space where a creation is free to unfold
totally in accordance to their true nature and become who and what
they are rather than want anyone wants them to be. In many ways,
this safe and secure space is the space that would be created for a
child or the offspring of a
perfectly matched
creatively
whole and complete feminine aspect and a
whole and complete masculine aspect of being. In this
space, since the masculine and feminine being are whole and complete
unto themselves, they would have no preconceived ideas and
expectation as to what their offspring should become or do in the
world. The offspring would be free to discover and explore their
true nature and unfold according to its own unique nature whatever
it looks like.
Related topic
A safe and secure space
Perfectly matched masculine and feminine
A whole and complete feminine aspect of being
A whole and complete masculine aspect of being
The buddy system in creating a safe and secure space
The relation of the masculine and feminine in creating a safe and
secure space
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