Basic process for awareness, awakening, enlightenment and transformation through sex

A Releasing Your Unlimited Creativity discussion topic

Copyright 2008 by K. Ferlic,   All Rights Reserved

Sex and sexuality can be used as a tool for awareness, a tool for awakening, a tool for enlightenment and a tool for transformation. What is achieved is determined by how we have focused our attention and awareness on what arises in sexuality. The process involving our sexuality for use of either of these tools is the same. It begins with one very simply understanding. The understanding is that the best biological mate to ensure the best genetic mix for the procreation of the species is smell. Every other criteria we use to select a mate is determined by our mind and we have conscious subconscious and unconscious preferences.

The conscious preferences are those that most related to what our ego likes and desires and what our ego wants. The subconscious preferences are more related to our enculturation and the experiences we have had in life. The unconscious preferences are those that arise from the genes and evolution of the human. As discussed in the topic on "Some observations from nature about sex" the human brain has evolve to seek pleasure and it we can find great pleasure in sex. But each of our bodies are different and we each will respond slightly different to sex. In this regard, there are some biological preferences other than smell. However, they are more related to the construction of our body and what we find enjoyable in our body than related to finding a genetic mate. Here, the preference is more about a mate how can stimulate our body in the way our body desires to feel.

Within this understanding, if we look carefully, there is not a person we can not intimately and passionately love at each and every level of their being. All that stands in our way is our mind and are our preferences. It needs to be noted here that loving someone is not about finding that perfect genetic match. Loving someone is all about what we think love is.

Within the creativity perspective, the view of love is seen as being willing to give, and become, whatever the creation needs us to become. It is not about what our mind wants and what it wants to give. We give in a way that nourishes the growth and unfoldment of the creation. Relative to any given individual it is about giving the individual what they need to grown and unfold into the truth of their being and for their creative spirit to become free to unfold true to itself and achieve what it incarnated to experience. Part of that experience may be the full experience of their physicalness including the feelings of the body and their sexuality.

Within this definition of love, to love someone sexually is to give them and become what they needs us to become so that they can experience the full depth and breadth of their sexuality and the physical experience of being sexual. It is to put our desires, wishes and wants, aside and give to the other. To do so requires us to be in the feminine aspect of our being and not the masculine. This also means we will feel very used and abused if our needs are somehow not met. This, in turn, requires a dance were each gives to the other in the way they need to be nourished alternating the lead so that one does not feel cheated and robbed in the relationship.

We need to understand that creation/Creation is not done alone and we each need another or others to gives us the experiences we desire to have. Additionally, we cannot give what we do not have. If we cannot love ourselves enough to spend the time to know our needs and be willing to give to ourselves what we need, we will be unable to give to another. in a way that meets their needs. The question is, "Are we willing to give any one individual the experience that they need to have for their unfoldment? Are we willing to intimately and passionately love at each and every level of their being the person who stands before in the way they need to be loved and nourished?" To be able to do this, we must be willing to give to ourselves the experiences we need to have for our unfoldment and to do so, we need to become aware to intimately and passionately love each and every level of our being to give to ourselves in a way that we are love and nourished. Until we do so, we cannot give to another in the why we need to give to them.

But here lies the key to sexuality as tool for awareness, awakening, enlightenment and transformation. It is to see the dance between our own needs and wants and those of the other. In looking to see what is required for their creative spirit to become free, we can see what we need to do for our creative spirit to become free. In looking to see where and how our creative spirit is held captive, we can see how the other’s creative spirit is bound held and captive. All thought the details and specific may different, the essence is the same for each for we both arise out of the same material of creation/Creation. It is in this dance we can begin to see the different between the needs of the creative spirit to grow and unfold and the wants of the mind based on what an individual thinks and believes.

Since our preferences lie in our conscious mind and nonconscious mind we can use our preferences as a doorway into our own mind for awareness, awakening, enlightenment, and transformation. In particular, the door is open as to an awareness of a variety of aspects of our conscious, subconscious and unconscious mind. In becoming aware of the preferences, wants and needs of our conscious, subconscious and unconscious mind relative to sexuality, we become awakened to how our mind functions and a variety of things we never knew about ourselves. Becoming awakened as to what lies in our mind and how we use it to make our decisions in life leads to an enlightenment about ourselves and how we are creating our experiences. That, in turn, opened the door to transforming ourselves to how we choose to respond and act on what we learn. It all flows from our preferences.

Our sexual preferences allows us to become aware of what we think and believe. If we are willing to pull the string on what we think and believe what we do and why we have the preferences we do, we can explore our belief structure This exploration leads to awareness of how our beliefs are both determining how we respond and act in life and how we are biased as to the reality of what is. This, in turn, leads to an awareness about of how we create our belief structure and create our experiences from the beliefs we hold. .

An awareness of how we create our belief structure allows us to become awaken as to why we have the belief structure we do. Awakening as to why we have the belief structure that we do opens the door to enlightenment about both how we create our experiences and create the reality we experience as a result of what we think and believe. In becoming enlightened as to how we create our experiences and the create the reality we experience, the door is open to transformation for we have the tools to consciously create a transformation of our being.

In exploring our preferences of our sexuality, we can come to understand that within the body and our genes is a unique sensing ability to carry on the evolutionary chain. But, more importantly we can come to understand there is an awareness in the body in what it feels such that our body does function like an antenna to sense energy and it is our genes which determine our unique sensing ability. We can then use this understanding in our life to sense energy. Coupled with how our belief structure works we can transform our life in any given direction we choose.

Unless we become fully aware and awake of how we think and believe and why we think and believe the way we do, we will never become creatively  free. The process to learn the nature of attachments and understand the desire and needs of the body is conceptually very simple and something we will need to explore if we wish to move past sexuality and freely utilize the physical intimacy of the body.

We are all drawn to what we think is an idea mate, that beloved, whether we see that beloved as a person or our concept of God. Knowing that mind will frame the energy we feel and the best it can based on the experiences it has, we can explore how mind is creating the illusion it is using to view Creation by how it response to the external muse or any other individual or thing to which it is drawn and/or finds sexually stimulating. In doing so, we can learn to transcend the filters mind is using and move pass the issue of sex and sexuality and use the new found freedom it finds to explore physical intimacy and awaken the wisdom and knowledge of the body. Then in the awareness of the body wisdom and intuitive guidance we can free ourselves from how we are bound both by the body preferences and our enculturation and/or socialization. In this freedom, can explore the true depth and breath of our creative powers.

Sexuality is a dance between what we want and what we need. Most accept what they can get and don’t look carefully at their true needs and why the have the wants that they do. If we look at the depth and breath of our needs, no one person will ever fulfill our true needs. The reason for this is quite simple. A seen in the topic, "Origins of Creation," and the "Observer observed pair and the nature of duality," our beloved, that for which we long, is really the entire creation that we experience. It is not one person or another but all of them and it may take many of them to fulfill all the needs we have. This is, of course, is hard to believe unless we understand the origins of Creation and how it is possible that we actually create the reality we experience.

In any case, to understand our preferences and how they are limiting us, we only need to think of how we feel about the person we can most passionately love and with whom we most desire to be with in that passion and with whom are willing to spend our life with no matter who and what they are and how they act. For those who feel they have transcended Physical Creation and God is their beloved, they can use God for this exercise. We only need to bow look at any individual on the face of the earth. Preferable we should choose someone we don’t like and could not be passion about for whatever reason we wish. Then we need to understand there is no reason why we can not be just as passionate about them as the person we desire. For those who seek God, see this person as God incarnate. We only need to realize the only thing that stands in our way of totally and passionately embracing this person are our beliefs, judgments, prejudices, opinions, biases and the like.

If we go through all the reasons analyzing and determining why they exist and why they are what they are, we can get to a point and see that we could passionately love this person or any other person. Additionally, we may surprise ourselves. If we do the internal work to achieve this understanding an not leave the understand only an intellectual exercise, we may find ourselves getting passionate about them. Now if we do the same exercise for a second or a third person we will find a new set of obstacles. But, in doing this process a few times, we will quickly come to see it is only our own beliefs that stand in the way and that this is true about seeing all of reality. All that stands in the way of us fully understanding and appreciating the beauty and the magnificent gift Creation has given in all facets of Creation us is our beliefs. Nothing more. If the human could learn to serve others in this awareness, they would also be serving the Divine for each person is the Divine manifested and they would be serving themselves for they are the Divine manifested.

The more and more we surface our beliefs, understand them and discard the ones that are not an accurate description of reality and/or our truth, the more we will awaken to the real nature of reality. In doing so we will find that we almost naturally enter the spontaneous and innocent childlike play of discovery and exploration of the universe and we can enter that play with anyone. If we accept and agree to not become diverted by the sexual experience we have, we can take a dramatic step forward in our own evolution into awareness.

However, most became sensually seduced by the physical enjoyment they find in sex and desire to control the experience such that they abandon any possibility of using sexuality as a tool for awareness, awakening and enlightenment. In being seduce by sexuality, we cause confusion within our being and a strong desire to control, and for some maybe even a violence desire, to develop that manifest in the way we hurt and injure others with our sexuality including controlling and manipulating others to meet our needs. We began to feel frustrated and anxious and many eventually we become angry. But we are not even sure what we are angry about. Somehow we are angry at ourselves and those who cannot satisfy our needs or allow us to satisfy our need. We may even see them as taking something from us. In doing so we lose touch with the Creator, our own divinity, and we feel deep emotional conflicts.

Rather than recognize and respect what is, we focused instead on our conflicts and differences between our want and our needs. We do not respect the Divine desire in each other that allows for the ebb and flow of Creation. We do not response nor understand the inherent nature of the sexuality in the creative process pulling us back to the Source of all Being. We are unwilling to accept and embrace the desire within the other and within in ourselves as a need to be fulfilled to take each of us back to the Source. We become unwilling to do the dance between our inner world and outer world and the need to create a wholeness within our own being and not seek externally what we must get internally. In doing so, we only add to the illusion of Creation and the separation we feel.

It needs to be understood that we each have an inner masculine and inner feminine which will become reflected externally as result of how  our inner world is reflected in the outer. If are inner masculine and inner feminine cannot come to maturity and find what we need within our own being, we look externally for what cannot be found. The perfect mate for each of us lies in a wholeness within our being that then gets reflected externally in the wholeness of Creation. But it is only in doing the inner work do we come to see and understand this. Whatever we seek externally, especially within a mate to meet our needs tells us what we need to do internally. The goal in any sexuality relationship should be able sharing life and creating a life both within and without that allows for a further expansion and grown of our own being. It is not to try and have someone in the external world looking to satisfy what comes within.

Related topic
Sexuality as a tool for awakening
Sexuality and becoming aware
Sexuality - a tool for enlightenment about our own mind and about creation
Sexuality as a tool for transformation

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